Tips For Better Long Distance Communication
Anyone that is in or has ever been in a long distance relationship can tell you that it is not easy. In fact, sometimes it can be so difficult that you think you would be better off without that person in your life. Before you even think about giving up, ask yourself what you and your partner are not doing to effectively communication.
Do I hide things from my partner?
Hiding the fact that you cannot make your Skype date with your partner because you have to go to a work dinner is no way to treat him. Openly communicating your obligations will not damage your relationship but build precious trust between both of you. If you happen to be hiding something from your partner and they find out about it, your relationship could be over before you know it. Most likely if you continue to hide things, you will not find your partner exploding at you – but you will find yourself imploding.
Am I always putting my partner first and rushing to get things done later?
One of the many things that I have learned in a long distance relationship is that you need to tell your partner when you need time to get your things done. You will only stress yourself out if you are sitting on the phone thinking about all that you need to do. This approach will also detract from the quality of your conversations if your mind is somewhere else. Do not neglect precious communication time by thinking about work or school – it is unfair to the person on the other end of the phone call. If you absolutely need to take care of something, your partner will understand because they too need time to take care of work or school.
Do I complain more often than I should?
When you complain about things to your partner, it is usually about one or two things: things that only affect you, and the fact that you are in a long distance relationship.
We can all agree and even come up with hundreds of reasons why long distance relationships are difficult – but the only thing that will change your relationship status from long distance to just a relationship is time for most situations. Before you even begin to complain about how much you hate being away from your partner, know that they feel the exact same way. Sometimes, they would rather just forget they are miles away from the person they love and talk about other things.
The next part can be true for both local and long distance relationships, but I think it weighs in a little more when all you can do is talk with your partner: chronic complaining. Telling your partner about problems and asking for advice is one thing, but if you continually complain about work, school, or your parents – your partner may gradually lose interest. At first you may be upset that your partner does not show interest while you complain about your issues, this may be because he or she does not want to hurt your feelings and tell you to stop complaining or complain to someone else. If your partner is the one complaining, be tactful when bringing this issue up.
Asking yourself these questions will help you to fine tune your communication skills and lead you to a healthier long distance relationship.